Revd Tim writes:

When I first came to the village a few years ago, I remember a village tree was ‘yarnbombed’ to support Tommy’s – a charity which funds research into the causes of miscarriage, still birth and premature birth. This made an impact and I cut out the article and still have it. At the time Sophy had just given birth to Jem, but he was our third pregnancy. So this is an issue close to my heart. Since coming to Redbourn, holding a service for those of us who have lost children, at whatever stage and under whatever circumstances, was something I wanted to do.

Loss at any stage of pregnancy is traumatic. Early loss is often not acknowledged or discussed, with commemorative services seldom taking place. Services for babies who are stillborn or lost in early years, are usually conducted whilst parents are in a fog of grief and pain.

This service, to be held at St Mary’s, is for anyone who has never had the opportunity to grieve the loss of a child, as well as for their children and their extended family and friends, whether the loss be recent or historic. Additionally, anyone who is grieving the fact that they have never had children is also welcome.

All are welcome regardless of the type or circumstances of loss they have experienced. Whether you have been through early or late miscarriage, missed miscarriage, compassion induction, an ectopic or molar pregnancy, stillbirth, neonatal or early infant loss or any other type of baby or child loss.

If you need to say goodbye to a baby or to grieve, or you want to come along with a friend who needs to say goodbye, you are welcome. The service will give you the opportunity to stand with other people who ‘know’ the pain of losing a child, whatever the circumstances, and to offer you a time to publicly acknowledge and remember children who have been lost.

There will also be non-judgemental pastoral support available after the service for anyone who needs it.

Lord, we pray for those who mourn, for parents and children, friends and neighbours.

Be gentle with them in their grief.

Show them the depths of your love, a glimpse of the kingdom of heaven.

Spare them the torment of guilt and despair.

Be with them as they weep beside the empty tomb of our risen Saviour,

Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.